to brooks:
something incredible has happened. i'm not sure you'll remember the details when you're older, so I'm writing it down here for you so you'll have it, and can read it and know its truth.
tonight, you told us about your decision to ask Jesus to save you.
your dad and I have prayed for this for a while. since before you were born actually, but more so in the last year. part of dealing with Tourette's has meant learning to cope with your tendencies to do things on impulse you might not otherwise do. it's been a challenge. you're so smart, so funny, and when you get going, well..things get a little nutty sometimes. It's just part of who you are (and also part of being a five year old little boy). so we've said for a while now, "man, this kid needs the Holy Spirit in his heart to help him with this!" we all need His help. so that's what we've been praying for you.
last night, you threw a car at daddy's big screen tv. it cracked the screen, and the tv is now toast. you felt pretty bad about it and couldn't tell us why you did it. we talked about it a little at bedtime, and you said that you knew it was a really big sin (in your mind, this is the worst thing you've ever done) and wondered if we and God would still love you. that broke my heart, my love. and yet, that's something that so many of us ask, even if not out loud. is God big enough to forgive and love me even in spite of my biggest sins? the answer is a resounding "YES!"
sweet boy, your dad and I will always love you, always forgive you. you are a precious gift from God, and there's nothing you can do that would ever make that love stop. but as much as we love you, Jesus loves you even more. and so, tonight at dinner as we chatted about who knows what, you casually mentioned that in your bed last night, you asked Jesus to forgive you for your "big sin" and come into your heart. we stuttered and stammered a bit; you always know how to surprise us! we didn't want to squash anything the Lord was doing in your heart, but we also wanted to make sure that you understood what you were saying, and we wanted to try to make sure you were sincere in your desire to live a life for Jesus. we talked through the ABC's... you admitted that you are a sinner, even going so far as to say that you knew you would want to sin again and needed Jesus's help to try not to do that. you said that you believe that Jesus died on the cross for your sins, and that He rose from the grave, alive, three days later. you said that it was like a present...that Jesus died for our sins and all you had to do was accept the gift. you're quite eloquent for your age, you know? lastly, you confessed that you needed Jesus and said that you asked Him to come into your heart. and then you asked us, "did He? did He come in? Or does He walk in slowly?" that made us laugh but we still weren't quite sure how to answer you. we called your childrens pastor, mr. lance, to see if he could help. we told him everything you'd said, and we agree with him that you've done everything that the Bible says you have to do to be saved. we asked you if you were ready for God to be your boss, instead of you being your own boss, and you said "I want that, mommy!"
so there it is, Brooks. last night, June 11, 2017, sometime around 8pm, you asked Jesus into your heart, and He saved you! praise Jesus!! we know you're young, and there are still things you won't understand, but we are committed to continue raising you to learn what Jesus has planned for your life, to learning how to live for Him. when you're ready, the Bible says to get baptized to show others a symbol of what He's done in your heart. I don't think you even know about baptism at this point, and besides, you won't put your head underwater, so that will come later on, whenever you're ready. for now, we take comfort and thank Jesus for the saving faith you've shown, for your unashamed belief in Jesus, His forgiveness, and being willing to step out and trust in Him. we are so blessed to be your parents...we feel that every single day. and God has answered one of our most fervent prayers by allowing us into the secret places of your heart, to witness what beautiful and wonderful things He is doing there. so when Satan tries to tell you that you couldn't possibly have come to know Jesus at the age of five...when he says "if you don't remember it, it didn't happen", I hope you look at this and trust. Jesus has saved you. You are His. and Satan has no power over you.
I will never forget the smile on your face when you realized and said, "so I'm a Christian?!" and we said "Yes!" we love you so much. and we're so thankful to now know that no matter what happens here on earth, we will be together with you in heaven for all of eternity. thank you, Jesus!
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